How do I improve my social quotient

Social skills: multi-faceted ability

There are many terms for it and yet mostly the same skills are meant: We are talking about the Social skills. Sometimes it appears in clauses in job advertisements, sometimes it is named directly. What exactly is behind it is not always clear. Only one thing is certain, without adequate social skills you will have a hard time professionally and privately. What is behind it ...

➠ Content: This is what awaits you

Social competence: what is meant by this?

The term social competence is made up of the words social = community and competence = ability. So someone who is socially competent has the ability to get on well with other people.

The Duden describes social competence as ...

Ability of a person to act independently in their social environment.

This is still a very rough definition, but it shows two essential things when it comes to social skills. On the one hand, that it depends on the social environment, i.e. the Interaction with other people. On the other hand, this very general explanation already makes it clear that the term is not very easy to explain.

That has to do with it different views about what social competence is:

  • A combination of assertiveness and adaptability or more
  • the totality of all abilities that facilitate or enable coexistence with other people.

Here social competence should be understood in the second meaning. Assertiveness, adaptability and social skills are not mutually exclusive - it is rather understood that a person manages to develop themselves based on their social skills enforce in crucial moments / areas.

The same applies to adaptability; this property can be called Flexibility and willingness to compromise - both properties that are undoubtedly an advantage if, for example, an agreement with other colleagues is pending.

The synonym for social skills is often used as:

Likewise, empathy, empathy and knowledge of human nature are used synonymously for social competence.

Social skills list: These skills are part of it

Here you will find the abilities listed in alphabetical order that make up social competence. You can find more detailed information on this in the linked career bible dossiers.

➠ Content: This is what awaits you

Importance of social skills in professional life

The above list makes it clear how broad the field of social skills is. What does that mean for professional life?

There is no job in which you are not somehow interact with other people have to. Even those who work from home in a quiet little room or who have started their own business have to get along with others. Sometimes it works better and sometimes less well.

Since people think differently, it is important to be able to empathize with others. First of all, you have to accept that not everyone thinks and acts like you. The next step is to respond appropriately, that is, not devaluing another person's behavior or reaction.

Social skills are particularly important when the Things are not going so well: It does not show great sovereignty or social competence when a boss yells at his trainee for doing something wrong. Showing your best side when everything is going well is a lot easier.

So it is of great importance to yourself this Acquire ability or to expand. In everyday work, it is important that teams get along with each other and are able to resolve conflicts with respect. In customer contact or in communication with business partners, you must also be able to deal with your counterpart in such a way that, firstly, your intention becomes clear and, secondly, discrepancies are eliminated.

Social competence is mentioned again and again as a key qualification, because it includes the areas that are necessary for the daily togetherness indispensable are. Of course, that doesn't mean that your technical expertise no longer plays a role.

But you can only turn this into success if you can together and don't work against each other:

  • they should Prove team spirit can when it comes to working with other colleagues in a team. Because together you get ahead.
  • You should adapt flexibly to your respective role and be able to act appropriately - whether as a colleague, team leader, employee, friend or neighbor. That is the prerequisite for a successful interaction with others.
  • You should be able to listen when it comes to understanding the motivations of others. So you signal that the other person is and whose opinion is important to you is.
  • You should be able to criticize constructively so that other people understand what it is about and not feel personally attacked.
  • On your part, you should be able to deal with criticism in order to avoid certain errors in the future and thus to be able to implement your projects more successfully.
  • You should be reliable and dependable. This signals to others that they take you seriously and can count on you.

Social competence test: How socially competent are you?

If you want to test your own social skills, you can do so with the tests linked below: They ask exactly the areas that are required for your social skills:

High social skills make it easier to work together

Anyone who has a high level of social skills is able to change perspective. He can empathize with other people and recognize what is important to them. He is able to use the facial expressions and body language of the other person to recognize whether they are angry, annoyed, relaxed or worried.

This is a prerequisite for your own Act accordingly coordinated can be. However, this is only possible if you have a general understanding of emotions: This enables you to describe your own feelings and needs.

People with rather low self-reflection and self-awareness tend to be quick-tempered and not very understanding of others.

However, social skills are always there too depending on the social environment and culture: What may still be considered socially competent in one place and within a social milieu is not in another place or milieu. Shaking hands can be used as an example:

In Germany and many Western countries, a handshake is part of the greeting. In Japan it is originally the Bow as greeting common. Those who shake hands here may be perceived as interculturally incompetent.

Social competence is what you make of it

Critics rightly point out that different understanding of what social competence is makes it difficult to use the term usefully. Because in many cases all the positive properties are subsumed under it. Or simply explaining social competence means:

Those who combine a large number of these positive characteristics are particularly socially competent and are particularly good at dealing with people. However, this calculation does not work out. A look into the past and the present is enough.

It always succeeds charismatic leadersTo unite people behind you, although many of the most important characteristics of social skills are not met. Psychopaths also know how to harness people for their own purposes and thus to deal with them, at least for a certain period of time, in such a way that they achieve what they aim to achieve.

Social skills can also mean that a person manages to get people up common values to address and convince of his visionary thoughts so that coordinated actions are possible.

In order for a person to manipulate other people not only for their own purposes, it is important Social skills in children to be promoted as early as possible. Parents are primarily asked to instill appropriate values ​​in their children.

An important phase in development is between the ages of three and six, when children in day-care centers and kindergartens learn to deal with each other in interaction with other children. For kids, it's about learning that achieve your own goals and to satisfy needs without overriding those of other children.

What other readers have read

[Photo Credit: janews by]